I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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