Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
