is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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