I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
