I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
