God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
