you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
