I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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