she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
this hospital has no fireball
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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