You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize