Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize