Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
