Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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