I wannas sexs uuuuu
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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