why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
