No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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