Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
