SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
