Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize