I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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