At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
