Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize