I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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