OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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