now i know why i became what i already was.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Princesses don't give blow jobs
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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