this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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