whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
God, you're like boner-b-gone
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
