Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
