I'm going to jail i love you
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
