she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
