Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize