about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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