everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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