help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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