I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
