Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
i now understand why vodka
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