just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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