:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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