you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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