This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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