yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize