she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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