ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
