Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
