I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize