She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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