check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
