Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
