I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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