That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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