im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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