see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
